Unapologetic Motherhood

So I've been handing out my personal business cards to people and it has this blog on it so I figured I should write in it since my last post was all the way back in July. Can I blame it being a new mother? Yea, let's go with that.

Motherhood is less maddening now, mostly because my own mother has been the biggest help. She can watch the babe if I go to networking events in the evening or when I have panels on weekends. I could leave Zakir at home when I  attend all these events but I'll be honest, I really miss him! Yes I have to leave some sessions to rock him to sleep (especially because he starts grunting loudly when he's tired) but it's still worth it to hold his warm, snuggly, chubby little body against me while I listen to presenters talk about political empowerment and activism.

Zakir and my mom joining me when I spoke at the League of Women Voters NJ Fall Democracy Forum

I know parenthood drastically changes ones life and often, ones waistline but I know for myself that I wanted to keep the parts of my life that were important to me alive somehow. This article about basically focusing on your baby and nothing else and having no friends is my worst nightmare. I seriously hope that my life never gets to that point, but is that even possible? Can you be a mom and not be holed up shut in with no other priorities except for the survival of your progeny?

 I present to you Lisa Ronzulli, member of the Italian parliament representing with her little girl

I see articles all over about motherhood and where mothers can bring kids. Everyone has an opinion, both men and women. There was an article on Jezebel, about how a mother was asked to leave a women's conference for bringing her baby. I should know by now to ignore the comments section of any online article, and this was no exception. People repeatedly agreed that babies should stay at home and that a mom should just "find a sitter".

There have been many times that I have taken Zakir out with me to women's meeting and panels when I didn't have to. I could have left him at home with my mother. However I take pride in bringing him along. I am still the old Nadia but am also a mother now and I don't understand why  being an active member of society without having to shove your baby off with a baby sitter can't be a thing. I don't take my kid everywhere- some places are not appropriate of course, or can be plain annoying or an ordeal for baby (such as all-day conferences)- but within reason I like to take him. I feel like political motherhood should be normalized. Just like the photo above. Being a mother is such a powerful thing, as mothers we are raising the future of us all. The future of our entire society! Every person comes from the body of a mother but still the treatment of women around the world and in our own backyard is appalling.

AAGGGHHHHH ::bangs head repeatedly against the same damn wall::

Being a mother is an incredible, amazing and challenging experience that shouldn't be relegated to being only within the home with your child or just taking them along for errands (unless that is fully your choice of course). Motherhood shouldn't be another excuse to marginalize women. But I think it is, in all honesty.

I'm still navigating the spaces of new motherhood along with what used to be my prior life. I am learning, I am making mistakes but I am also carving my own place with my baby. Not just for us but for women everywhere. I hope to be an example of what is possible. Motherhood is well known for its sacrifices, but not as much for its possibilities. I hope to focus on the possibilities and am going to bring Zakir along for the ride. Because what could more powerful than for my boy to see a woman rocking in the public and activist sphere? I can think of no better experience to leave him with and I hope that one day he can appreciate it. I hope one day all of us can appreciate it!

Respect, we deserve it!

The Journey So Far...So Good

I sometimes reflect on my postings over the last 2-3 years. I re-started writing on my blog when I became unemployed 3 years ago. Being stuck in California, a brand new place with no friends and hardly any acquaintances, failing miserably at the job that enabled me to move here and kerplunking my way out of ever EVEN applying to law school led to some serious confidence issues. I was so blue that I wasn't even blue, I was black, I had a black emo soul (complete with side bangs and crappy music). Everything sucked and I had no idea how to build myself up. This is something I chronicle somewhat often on this blog, I do it because frankly, that's what made this blog really happen. Actually its what made everything that is happening in my life now happen.

My emo self can best be illustrated by Spongebob with a visually impairing haircut

I actually had to  a chance to reflect on this in front of a group of students just this week. This past Monday I was a guest lecturer for a Asian American Studies Class on South Asian Diaspora at UC Berkeley.  I presented on South Asian activism and was invited to do so be a fellow activist and professor who found my contact through the emails I sent as part of ASATA (the Alliance of South Asians Taking Action). There was a moment when she had me fill out a honorarium form, in case I could get paid for the presentation as a guest, which made me reflect back on when I worked at UC Berkeley and was the admin person processing the honorarium forms. Now I was filling one out myself, waiting for someone else to process it. Funny how things circle back around.

Okay, not really, but whatever

In this class I was to talk about my own story, on the inspiration behind my activist, how I became an activist, my struggles and triumphs, and all the work I've done.  I should have just given them this blog link and called it a day, but then I wouldn't have had the chance to blab on for 90 minutes straight. Hence the name of my blog would be moot.

Here are the awesome college students who got to hear me talk, and talk and talk =D

When I started to go over my activism, what it's done and what it has meant to me I realize that 90 minutes wasn't close to being enough time to go over it all. And just coz I can't stop talking ( well yea there's that) but also because I have done SO much. I am not saying that to brag. Actually it's a little scary, as I looked into the faces of these bright and shiny young people, I realized that they probably thought I was insane. I mean my activism has been all over the place. After I first became unemployed in 2010, my life was basically one huge journey of trying anything and everything my activist heart desired. Did I want to work on women's issues? How about the situation in Burma? What about Muslim Americans and civil rights? Or South Asian Women's poetry? Photojournalism? Blogging? Democratic Politics? Empowerment of the African Community? How about all of the above?!! No seriously, I did all of the above and more at the same time. That's a LOT, and frankly it's a bit nuts.

Good question Uncle Sam, good question...

But isn't that what you're supposed to be like in your 20's? Experimental? I guess instead of experimenting with drugs, or people, I experimented with activism. I was like an activism mad scientist. It was my 'thing', but I didn't know what issue was MY issue in particular. So I figured I would try them out, sort of like the guess and check method from grade school. Now that law school was out of the question, it was a whole new beginning with tons of possibilities and opportunities and I took all of them.

I spoke to the students about my work with the young Democrats, about getting involved for the first time in local politics by helping on a Oakland city council campaign and joining the board of the East Bay Young Democrats. I spoke about helping to co-found the Black Young Democrats of the East Bay, after naming and addressing the need for cultivating young black leadership in this area. I spoke about being a writer and performer for Yoni Ki Baat, the South Asian Vagina monologues for two years. YKB as it is known has spread throughout the country, but I have been honored to share the stage with and befriended the inspiring women who started it all here in the Bay Area. I spoke about my API organizing, my political blogging for Hyphen, my adventures at the DNC and how I eventually was able to serve on the leadership of NAPAWF. All of that is documented on this blog. I think that's so special. It's an open journal for the world to read, and one that I look to as my journey continues.

I have no idea

 All of this activism was part of my crazy process, but this crazy process was recently recognized as I was selected as part of something called the GOOD 100. I had no idea what this was, but apparently its a quartlerly magazine that outlines people and projects that have done good throughout the world.

Look Ma, I'm in a magazine!

And I made their 100 people who are making a difference in the world for 2014. I was floored, i was shocked, they called me  a big mouth. it was all very fitting. I have to admit, it is pretty cool to be chosen along with a supermodel, the daughter of a president and other kickass people from all over the world. I feel like I am a bit underwhelming compared to these people but hey, I've got to learn to own it (it meaning being awesome without apologizing which honestly, can be so hard to do!).

NAPAWF Power Up Summit! We rock!

So the journey continues, the weeks before the GOOD 100 and my guest lecture saw me take part in my first NAPAWF (National Asian Pacific American Women's Forum)'s Power up! summit as a board member, where we got promptly snowed out in the crazy non stop blizzards that the East Coast had to offer this year. I also was honored to join in the New American Leaders Project training for immigrant leaders who want to be in leadership positions, especially those that want to run for office.

Yay for being leaders, yay for being diverse yay for being diverse leaders! NALP's New Jersey training ya'll

Does this mean I'll run for office one day? What did I just say about the guess and check method? I'm still guessing I suppose, we'll see if any of it finally checks out one day....

And so it goes...

Life is  amazing! And super busy! I haven't posted in awhile, but that's because I've been pre-occupied with blogging up a storm as a Political Blogger at Hyphen magazine. I've been covering stories for over a year now, but have also been writing a bunch of guest blogs for other sites. So that's been taking up a lot of brain space.

Man, it's a jungle in there

Apparently though, some people actually read this thing, so I figure I'd better get up on putting on new content. There's always LOTS to talk about (especially when I'm involved). Also I got married in July, it was a grand Bangla-dorian (Bengali/Salvadoran) wedding and I should totally write about it...yea will get on that.


In the meanwhile, here is the link to my Hyphen posts:
http://www.hyphenmagazine.com/blog/nadia-hussain

Yea Hyphen is awesome

and I am cross-posting my latest post below. Have been working on immigration issues for years, and will be focusing more on the topic now that I am a new member of the national governing board of the National Asian Women's Political Forum (NAPAWF), which may have excited me more than my wedding ( I know what a loser, right?).

Yay NAPAWF Board pic in sunny Arizona!

So yea been covering immigration, especially regarding Comprehensive Immigration Reform lately. So please check out my articles,  only if you feel like it. If you don't feel like it, you can just click here and judge kittens.

For the rest of you, my latest article is below, it was cross listed to some pretty sweet blogs, such as Racialicious and Angry Asian Man (!)

My friend Greg in the Pride flag and self-scrawled T-shirt, and yes he is also awesome, as awesome as judging kittens....

Photo by Soyun Park/AAPI Immigration Table.  Photo by Soyun Park/API Immigration Table

Photo by Soyun Park/AAPI Immigration Table

Not Your Model Minority

by: S. Nadia Hussain

On October 8, Gregory Cendana, the Executive Director of the Asian Pacific American Labor Alliance (APALA) was arrested, along with two hundred other activists and eight members of Congress in our nation's capitol. In photos from that day, he is seen being led away in handcuffs with a pride flag tied around his neck like superhero cape and a handwritten t-shirt -- with the words “Not your Model Minority” scrawled on the front. Cendana is Asian American and his actions that day stood as a testament to the diverse communities that are impacted by the lack of immigration reform. 

Immigration is often framed as an issue impacting mostly Latino populations. According to the Pew Hispanic Center -- though the modern immigration wave from Latin America has made up 50% of US immigration, migration from Asia makes up a substantial 27%. Outside of Mexico, the leading countries of origin of immigrants are India, the Philippines and China.  Asians make up 13% of the US undocumented population. The US Office of Homeland security estimates that as of 2009, the largest undocumented Asian populations are 270,000 immigrants from the Philippines, 200,000 from India, 200,000 from Korea and 120,000 from China.

The stereotype of Asians as the model minority makes invisible the stories of the individuals and families behind these numbers. While immigration reform stalls within legislative chambers, activists and community members have come out in droves to highlight its impact on their communities. The October 8^th action was part of a coordinated campaign around immigration reform launched by eight national AAPI organizations.

It was also the third immigration action taken within the last six months in D.C. There was the protest less than a month ago, where roughly 200 women protested and over 100 were arrested as part of as mass demonstration. Before that, there was an organized protest on August 1, where over 46 labor leaders, immigrant advocates, environmental activists, people of faith, and DREAMers blocked the street in front of Capitol Hill while 300 allies and four members of Congress cheered  them on.

Yet in light of the Government shutdown, many are afraid that immigration efforts will be stalled indefinitely. “Have our congressional leaders forgotten that this is a nation of immigrants?” Cendana asks. “America is a nation of values, founded on the idea that all men and women are created equal. How we treat new immigrants reflects our commitment to the values that define America and how we define American.”

These words and actions haven’t escaped the attention of the President. The day after reaching a deal to re-open the government, President Obama vowed to pursue a House vote on immigration reform: “The majority of Americans think this is the right thing to do” said the President, “and it’s sitting there waiting for the House to pass it....But let’s not leave this problem to keep festering...This can and should get done by the end of this year.” 

The ongoing pressure from these communities may help ensure that the President delivers on this resolve and that Congress realizes that the immigration issue won’t disappear -- shutdown or no shutdown. Activists

On October 8, Gregory Cendana, the Executive Director of the Asian Pacific American Labor Alliance (APALA) was arrested, along with two hundred other activists and eight members of Congress in our nation's capitol. In photos from that day, he is seen being led away in handcuffs with a pride flag tied around his neck like superhero cape and a handwritten t-shirt -- with the words “Not your Model Minority” scrawled on the front. Cendana is Asian American and his actions that day stood as a testament to the diverse communities that are impacted by the lack of immigration reform. 
Immigration is often framed as an issue impacting mostly Latino populations. According to the Pew Hispanic Center -- though the modern immigration wave from Latin America has made up 50% of US immigration, migration from Asia makes up a substantial 27%. Outside of Mexico, the leading countries of origin of immigrants are India, the Philippines and China.  Asians make up 13% of the US undocumented population. The US Office of Homeland security estimates that as of 2009, the largest undocumented Asian populations are 270,000 immigrants from the Philippines, 200,000 from India, 200,000 from Korea and 120,000 from China.
The stereotype of Asians as the model minority makes invisible the stories of the individuals and families behind these numbers. While immigration reform stalls within legislative chambers, activists and community members have come out in droves to highlight its impact on their communities. The October 8^th action was part of a coordinated campaign around immigration reform launched by eight national AAPI organizations.
It was also the third immigration action taken within the last six months in D.C. There was the protest less than a month ago, where roughly 200 women protested and over 100 were arrested as part of as mass demonstration. Before that, there was an organized protest on August 1, where over 46 labor leaders, immigrant advocates, environmental activists, people of faith, and DREAMers blocked the street in front of Capitol Hill while 300 allies and four members of Congress cheered  them on.
Yet in light of the Government shutdown, many are afraid that immigration efforts will be stalled indefinitely. “Have our congressional leaders forgotten that this is a nation of immigrants?” Cendana asks. “America is a nation of values, founded on the idea that all men and women are created equal. How we treat new immigrants reflects our commitment to the values that define America and how we define American.”
These words and actions haven’t escaped the attention of the President. The day after reaching a deal to re-open the government, President Obama vowed to pursue a House vote on immigration reform: “The majority of Americans think this is the right thing to do” said the President, “and it’s sitting there waiting for the House to pass it....But let’s not leave this problem to keep festering...This can and should get done by the end of this year.” 
The ongoing pressure from these communities may help ensure that the President delivers on this resolve and that Congress realizes that the immigration issue won’t disappear -- shutdown or no shutdown. Activists and officials like the ones who protested and were arrested last week will be there to ensure that it doesn’t.
- See more at: http://www.hyphenmagazine.com/blog/archive/2013/10/not-your-model-minority-asian-americans-and-immigration-fight#sthash.xiHI8VTH.dpuf

On October 8, Gregory Cendana, the Executive Director of the Asian Pacific American Labor Alliance (APALA) was arrested, along with two hundred other activists and eight members of Congress in our nation's capitol. In photos from that day, he is seen being led away in handcuffs with a pride flag tied around his neck like superhero cape and a handwritten t-shirt -- with the words “Not your Model Minority” scrawled on the front. Cendana is Asian American and his actions that day stood as a testament to the diverse communities that are impacted by the lack of immigration reform. 
Immigration is often framed as an issue impacting mostly Latino populations. According to the Pew Hispanic Center -- though the modern immigration wave from Latin America has made up 50% of US immigration, migration from Asia makes up a substantial 27%. Outside of Mexico, the leading countries of origin of immigrants are India, the Philippines and China.  Asians make up 13% of the US undocumented population. The US Office of Homeland security estimates that as of 2009, the largest undocumented Asian populations are 270,000 immigrants from the Philippines, 200,000 from India, 200,000 from Korea and 120,000 from China.
The stereotype of Asians as the model minority makes invisible the stories of the individuals and families behind these numbers. While immigration reform stalls within legislative chambers, activists and community members have come out in droves to highlight its impact on their communities. The October 8^th action was part of a coordinated campaign around immigration reform launched by eight national AAPI organizations.
It was also the third immigration action taken within the last six months in D.C. There was the protest less than a month ago, where roughly 200 women protested and over 100 were arrested as part of as mass demonstration. Before that, there was an organized protest on August 1, where over 46 labor leaders, immigrant advocates, environmental activists, people of faith, and DREAMers blocked the street in front of Capitol Hill while 300 allies and four members of Congress cheered  them on.
Yet in light of the Government shutdown, many are afraid that immigration efforts will be stalled indefinitely. “Have our congressional leaders forgotten that this is a nation of immigrants?” Cendana asks. “America is a nation of values, founded on the idea that all men and women are created equal. How we treat new immigrants reflects our commitment to the values that define America and how we define American.”
These words and actions haven’t escaped the attention of the President. The day after reaching a deal to re-open the government, President Obama vowed to pursue a House vote on immigration reform: “The majority of Americans think this is the right thing to do” said the President, “and it’s sitting there waiting for the House to pass it....But let’s not leave this problem to keep festering...This can and should get done by the end of this year.” 
The ongoing pressure from these communities may help ensure that the President delivers on this resolve and that Congress realizes that the immigration issue won’t disappear -- shutdown or no shutdown. Activists and officials like the ones who protested and were arrested last week will be there to ensure that it doesn’t.
- See more at: http://www.hyphenmagazine.com/blog/archive/2013/10/not-your-model-minority-asian-americans-and-immigration-fight#sthash.xiHI8VTH.dpuf

On October 8, Gregory Cendana, the Executive Director of the Asian Pacific American Labor Alliance (APALA) was arrested, along with two hundred other activists and eight members of Congress in our nation's capitol. In photos from that day, he is seen being led away in handcuffs with a pride flag tied around his neck like superhero cape and a handwritten t-shirt -- with the words “Not your Model Minority” scrawled on the front. Cendana is Asian American and his actions that day stood as a testament to the diverse communities that are impacted by the lack of immigration reform. 
Immigration is often framed as an issue impacting mostly Latino populations. According to the Pew Hispanic Center -- though the modern immigration wave from Latin America has made up 50% of US immigration, migration from Asia makes up a substantial 27%. Outside of Mexico, the leading countries of origin of immigrants are India, the Philippines and China.  Asians make up 13% of the US undocumented population. The US Office of Homeland security estimates that as of 2009, the largest undocumented Asian populations are 270,000 immigrants from the Philippines, 200,000 from India, 200,000 from Korea and 120,000 from China.
The stereotype of Asians as the model minority makes invisible the stories of the individuals and families behind these numbers. While immigration reform stalls within legislative chambers, activists and community members have come out in droves to highlight its impact on their communities. The October 8^th action was part of a coordinated campaign around immigration reform launched by eight national AAPI organizations.
It was also the third immigration action taken within the last six months in D.C. There was the protest less than a month ago, where roughly 200 women protested and over 100 were arrested as part of as mass demonstration. Before that, there was an organized protest on August 1, where over 46 labor leaders, immigrant advocates, environmental activists, people of faith, and DREAMers blocked the street in front of Capitol Hill while 300 allies and four members of Congress cheered  them on.
Yet in light of the Government shutdown, many are afraid that immigration efforts will be stalled indefinitely. “Have our congressional leaders forgotten that this is a nation of immigrants?” Cendana asks. “America is a nation of values, founded on the idea that all men and women are created equal. How we treat new immigrants reflects our commitment to the values that define America and how we define American.”
These words and actions haven’t escaped the attention of the President. The day after reaching a deal to re-open the government, President Obama vowed to pursue a House vote on immigration reform: “The majority of Americans think this is the right thing to do” said the President, “and it’s sitting there waiting for the House to pass it....But let’s not leave this problem to keep festering...This can and should get done by the end of this year.” 
The ongoing pressure from these communities may help ensure that the President delivers on this resolve and that Congress realizes that the immigration issue won’t disappear -- shutdown or no shutdown. Activists and officials like the ones who protested and were arrested last week will be there to ensure that it doesn’t.
- See more at: http://www.hyphenmagazine.com/blog/archive/2013/10/not-your-model-minority-asian-americans-and-immigration-fight#sthash.xiHI8VTH.dpuf

Represent

There are not enough women or minorities in office, and there should be. Yes, I am saying this because I am a South Asian woman living in the US.

But that's not the only reason. Women make up the majority of the US population, yet hold an alarmingly small percentage of public office positions. Quick, name another period of history where the majority in a population was ruled by a minority in power....

Time's up!  South Africa during apartheid.

 

Not a fun comparison, but this is a sorry situation. During Assemblywoman Nancy Skinner's speech at the Amazing Women's Conference in Berkeley, CA,  she pointed out that of the over 1,000 members to have served in the California State Assembly, she was only the 200th something woman to ever serve  in the state assembly.  I'm guesstimating that it's around 20 percent. More accurate figures point to even lower percentages, around 18%. Well that's history, right? Let's look at present figures, In 2011 women held 16.6 % of seats in Congress and hold 17% of the 100 seats in Senate.  The kicker of course is that women make up 50.7 percent of the US population, according to the 2010 US Census Bureau. To top this off, for the first time in 30 years, 2011 has seen a decline of women serving in Congress. I've heard that at this rate it will take 600+ years before women have equal representation.

If all things were equal (which they are not as I've outlined in other posts), women should hold slightly over 50% of these seats, but they don't. Women are a majority whose rights and interests are not represented fairly or evenly.

What about minorities in legislature? The U.S. population includes 12 percent African Americans, 9 percent Hispanics, and 3 percent Asian/Pacific Islanders and other groups.  White people make up 72% of the current US population, and I remember reading that the percentage of white males in the US make up around 32% of the total population (don't quote me on this). In Congress, however, 90 percent of the lawmakers are male, and 87 percent are white. (source: http://www2.scholastic.com/browse/article.jsp?id=4732).

When it comes to race and gender, major systemic changes that reflect the interests of the population as a whole are not being properly represented. I am stating the obvious and most likely preaching to the choir (since most of you reading this blog are my friends and/or other  activists). So it's great that we may know all of this, but how many of us are running for office? 

I spent a few hours last month at the headquarters opening of the David Chiu for Mayor Campaign. David Chiu is running for Mayor of San Francisco in 2011 and if he wins he will be the first elected Asian American Mayor of the city of San Francisco. 

David Chiu speaking at his campaign HQ opening

Chiu's district includes Chinatown, which is the largest Chinese community outside Asia. Obviously Chiu is not running on just an Asian American base, to be an effective public servant and to win office, you need to collect votes  and appeal to voters from all sectors. It reminded me of when Jean Quan won the mayoral race in Oakland and became the first Asian American woman to hold the position of Mayor of a major city. My friend Jennifer Pae also ran around the same time as Quan. Jennifer ran for Councilwoman of District 2 in Oakland, CA and I volunteered non-stop for her campaign. One big reason for my enthusiastic involvement in Jenn's campaign was due to my previous work with the Ready to Run Rising Stars program at the Center for Women and Politics at Rutgers University. My work with Rising Stars was focused on getting young Asian women to join CAWP's  'Ready to Run' program for women who want to run for office, seek higher office, work on a campaign, get appointed to office, or learn more about the political system. This was one major reason I supported Jennifer. Though she did not win the election, I was inspired and proud to see a young Asian woman putting it all out there and just going for it. That is how roads are paved and examples set.

Outside of the Jennifer Pae Campaign HQ

I hope that last paragraph was inspiring, but there's a long way to go. Really long. We need more people like the those that I mentioned above. Where are my South Asians at? Bobby Jindal? Nikki Haley? Please, we need South Asians that run on a platform that actually address issues impacting the South Asian Community.

Kamala Harris, my political girl-crush

There are some great examples of South Asian politicians currently holding office. Recently, Kamala Harris was elected as the Attorney General of the state of California, becoming the first female, African American, and Asian American attorney general of CA and the first Indian American Attorney General in the US (wow all that in one person, you go girl!)  Ravi Bhalla is an Indian Sikh American who ran in the primary for Assemblyman in my former state, New Jersey.  There's Upendra Chivikula -- an extremely active South Asian Assemblyman--also in NJ who I had the pleasure of meeting on various occasions. There is also my old friend Dr. Nuran Nabi, who is Bangladeshi and is a committeeperson for the city of Plainsboro, NJ.

 

Again, these stories are great but we need MORE. I should run for office, maybe one day I will.  Maybe I can just run so that I can say I did, then I can bug everyone else to run. I am not saying that people should be voted into office exclusively because of their ethnic background or that I will vote for someone just because they are a minority or a woman. I need to agree with a candidates politics and the policy stances they take. But there is a chance that people who look like me may understand the needs and issues I care about more than people who don't, just maybe.  Without women and people of color in these positions, crucial voices and issues may not be brought to the table. Our absence unfortunately often signals our silence. Take the example of when I attended a panel in Sacramento hosted by the California Commission on the Status of Women about the troubling misrepresentation of women in media. The panel was made up of mostly white women save for one Latina woman, Elmy Bermejo, the Interim Executive Director of the Latino Issues Forum. Many issues were discussed, but the issues relating to minority women were absent until Elmy spoke up.  The point is if she were not there that day her voice and the voice of minority women would have been absent from that discussion.

Abel Guillen speaking to supporters and friends

I relayed this point to Abel Guillen, a member of the Peralta School Board in Oakland, CA who is considering a run for California State Assembly. I expressed the point that him running for and perhaps winning an elected office would bring voices to the table that would otherwise be silent if he was not there.

Run, please run. At least think about it, or consider doing it one day. Encourage our young leaders. Mentor. VOTE. Encourage others in your ethnic communities to vote, since many of them don't do or may not have the resources to even do that much. It's great that there are plenty South Asian or Asian engineers and doctors, but in order for there to be real progressive change there needs to be strides taken within the public sphere. I'm not an engineer or a doctor, but I hope to be part of this movement, this change towards more diversity in the decision making bodies that represent all of us. Women need to run, lots of them need to run and they need to run now. Yes women's rights have improved greatly since women's suffrage and the women's rights movement of

the 60's, but we haven't reached equality, not by a long shot. Run sisters run, run brothers run, it can happen. The people mentioned above are helping to pave that path, and it is up to me and you to make sure that kind of action continues, with our generation and the ones that will come after.

Women and the V-Word

Photo by Sean Kirkpatrick

I've recently had some powerful womanly experiences. No, not birth or anything having to do with my reproductive cycle (well sort of), but I have been attending some pretty interesting woman centered events lately. One such event was a performance of the Vagina Monologues by Filipina Women in San Francisco. Those of you that know me know that I performed in Yoni Ki Baat, the South Asian Vagina Monologues a few months ago. You can read the post about it here. I attended the Filipina women's performance because my friend Nwe was being awarded by the organizers for her activism work and I also attended to experience another Vagina Monologues; this time as a member of the audience.

It was interesting.  The show that I was involved with though inspired by Eve Ensler's piece, was sort of its own thing. The participants in Yoni Ki Baat either wrote their own pieces or read the pieces that others had submitted. The show I recently attended however  presented pieces from Ensler's original performance of the Vagina Monologues, read and performed by various women on stage. It was sort of cool to see and experience the different versions of the Vagina Monologues. I never saw performances of Ensler's original play and for some reason I was surprised that a lot of it was literally about VAGINAS and what vaginas did, or wanted to do. I was a bit shocked. As liberal as I'd like to think I am, I grew up in a conservative Bangladeshi Muslim household. Sex was forbidden, boys were forbidden, and for a good chunk of my life, I believed that even thinking about boys was forbidden. So yes, the vestiges of this upbringing can still hold strong. There was a session of faking orgasms onstage, talking about what your vagina would wear, monologues against shaving and tampons and so on. My poor friend who was being awarded was a little taken aback. She also comes from a conservative background, being Burmese and raised in Bangladesh.  She had invited various members from her conservative Burmese community to attend the show. To say it was a shock to her and community members in attendance is an understatement, as she stood on stage a bit dazed with a huge plaque that read "Vagina Warrior". 

Photo by Sean Kirkpatrick

But the show is supposed to be shocking and empowering, right? Honestly, this is where I think my dual background comes out. I am Bangladeshi American after all. The American, westernized part of me understands the rhetoric behind this play: the pushing of buttons, the reclaiming of "Vagina". But the Bangladeshi, Barisal/Sylheti village part of me is secretly uncomfortable and well, a little lost about what all of this means, even though I am a feminist who strongly supports and hopefully embodies woman power and equality. I saw the gorgeous woman on stage in all of their diverse glory and loved it, while the other part of me didn't get it, thinking "can we talk about women's stories and issues without bringing up sex organs?".

Seriously though, you go girl
(photo by Sean Kirkpatrick)

Maybe that's controversial, I might get slack for thinking this way, but I'm being honest about my thoughts and the duality of my perspective. What Eve Ensler is accomplishing with her V-Day project is truly amazing and I am so inspired by the work she does. I do wonder though how women in other countries, especially more conservatives countries, react to the idea of talking about vaginas in an open way. When I told my mother that I was performing in something called the Vagina Monologues. She said "tsssk, in this country, they talk about things so openly."

However being "closed" does not equal oppression, not always, just like being open does not always  imply freedom. For my mother and her cultural upbringing, keeping intimate things, well intimate, held it's own power, something that didn't need to be out there for everyone to know.


Which brings up a bigger debate, where some may look at scantily clad women and the constant portrayal of women in media as sexual objects and think that they are being oppressed, while others may look at women who cover up as being oppressed for not being able or being comfortable to show off their faces or bodies.

For me, I think that the vital element in all of this is CHOICE. If I choose to wear a short skirt because I love it, then let me be. If I want to wear a hijab because I want to, then that is my choice as well. The complication may come about when we think of what affects our choices. Society? Men? Media? Culture? Patriarchal hierarchies? All of the above? What does choice even mean....arrgghh my head hurts and this post is going on for much too long.


I have no conclusion, I want to do what makes me happy, what makes me feel good inside. Maybe for me, it's not talking about my vagina, but also respecting the idea that others may do this and that feels great for them...and that it may not feel so great for other women and that's also okay.

CHOICE, a simple idea, but it can be a complicated concept in the real world. I  hope that women can at least have a choice, and be happy with the paths they choose. Maybe that is what the Vagina Monologues is really about, because unfortunately women today around the world, and in this country are being denied choices: Wisconsin, Tennessee Try To Pull Planned Parenthood Funding

and are being denied choices
Woman's 'Honor' Killing Sparks Outrage In West Bank

and are being denied choices
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/eve-ensler/over_b_861159.html

A Creative Process...

Yesterday was the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day, and in honor of this day, I was planning on writing this awesome, knock-your-socks off post about women and awesomeness and fighting the good fight and...

yea well I'm sick ....I've been sick since Friday and these coughing fits just won't quit.

So you have this post instead. This past weekend was the culmination of an absolutely amazing and inspiring experience for me. It was my first time performing at Yoni Ki Baat, which is the South Asian Vagina Monologues. After practicing for two months, I got on stage, along with a bevy of diverse, creative and wonderful women to express our unique monologues and poems to our audience in the Mission District of San Francisco.

There are so many emotions involved in this for me. For one, I remember coming to San Francisco as a tourist almost two years ago,

(Me being a tourist in San Francisco)

running around the Mission Dolores and the Castro clicking away with my camera since I pretty much figured I wouldn't be coming back to the Bay Area anytime soon, if ever. And now here I was performing IN the Mission. Funny where life takes you, from tourist to local performer, I definitely didn't see THAT coming.

Back to the show though. When I first submitted my poem "Mother May I" to Yoni Ki Baat, I had no idea what to expect. I was stoked to get picked, but I still had no idea what I was getting into. As I came to the first rehearsal, I felt sorta weird. I vaguely knew one person, and I had no idea if I would be totally out of place here. Although I'm loud and extroverted, I'm not a seasoned stage performer by any means, and yea I was very nervous.

From that first nervous day, so many things have changed. The women I met became my friends and my teachers, as they gave me tips on how to improve my performance, use my stage space and SLOW DOWN (which I still can't say has quite happened). There were times when I felt totally lost, thinking "wow I can't do this, many of these woman just GET it". Yet the comfort came came, as the pieces were memorized, and there were times when I saw some of the vulnerabilities and strengths of my fellow performers. I think that helped, and it also made me feel closer to them and to the pieces we were putting out there for the world to see.

The amazing thing is, each and every one of the pieces in the show was special to me. It was exciting to see words on paper transform into an actual performance, with feeling and expression. It was a pretty cool process to see how each woman made their piece their own, whether they had written them or not. Every performance was a journey, and I was glad to have been a witness to that journey.

Most of the YKB women are not professional performers. Roberto mentioned how so many of the performers looked completely at home on stage. I told him it was because of practice, practice, practice. The truth is, these women came from very diverse backgrounds. From a Harvard trained doctor who works at a community health center using her experience working with families to inspire a piece on delivering babies, to a high school teacher, a lawyer, an environmental activist, a recording artist/electronic musician, a scientist and so much more. All of these women came together to become fast friends, performers and yes, sisters to put on Yoni Ki Baat.

This experience has certainly made me follow through with my own creative process. Following through with a performance in front of 200+ crowds was quite an undertaking. I even cried after my performance, when all of us took the stage after the final show. It was all such a rush, and it was overwhelming to just give your all to a performance and have it be over. Roberto held me as I blubbered like a baby, they were tears of joy to be sure, and grateful tears to have have the opportunity to be a part of this.

This blog is also part of my creative process, which is continuing, changing, evolving (I hope). I just started another project, which is sort of my baby right now, it's a new photo essay blog called (Extra)Ordinary People at usordinarypeople.blogspot.com. I have also joined a sort of "women's circle" of writers, to inspire each other and push each other to continue the creative process even when we don't feel like it (writing is truly a discipline that needs to be cultivated and tended to!)

So I am still in this process, Yoni Ki Baat was a fantastic part of it, and I can only hope for more amazing ventures and experiences in my future.

Love you ladies, Yonis forever!